Moving On From Lovestruck

Two people in love on beach during sunset

Love Island

We’ve all experienced situations when we meet someone who we really like, only to have it end sooner than we desired or expected. Experiencing lovestruck can happen at any age; you never know when a certain person will push your buttons and unexpectedly activate you. But when certain buttons are pushed, they can provide you with one of the best feelings in the world; however, moving on from lovestruck is important for your mental health.

The worst days are the immediate ones right after the person who you really liked is no longer in your life. The thought of being alone once again quickly touches down in the center of your mind, eliciting a punching bag of emotions, including tears. The connection you had formed with the other person on love island is no longer at play.

But you cannot continue living on love island if the other person is now gone; it’s not mentally healthy. You have to be thankful that God placed that person in your life for whatever amount of time, and happily move on. It’s tough at first because you dearly miss them, but you have to treat yourself with respect, and suffering from lovestruck is not fair to yourself.

The way that you move on from lovestruck is to remain optimistic that you will meet a new person in the future. You don’t have to forget about the previous person. As a matter of fact, cherish the memories that the two of you built together, but don’t dwell on them all day, every day. Be thankful that you met them and grateful for the experience, but move on into the future.

Love is probably one of the most powerful emotions known to man, especially when you share it with someone who you easily click with, and develop a natural connection from the moment that you lay eyes on each other. But love works in unpredictable ways; as quickly as it comes into your life, just as quickly that it can vanish from it.

But don’t be sad! The most important thing is that you are happy that you had another taste of love island. But you cannot always live on love island forever. Sometimes you have to get back on your boat and return to sailing the deep blue sea.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Yesterday Was Better Than Today

Woman with brown curly hair lying in bed covering face and surrounded by photos

When The Past Makes You Hate The Present

The past does a great job at acquiring a master bedroom in your memory bank; it prefers a nice big condo where it can enjoy the comfort of spacious freedom. Whenever it feels like partying, it turns up the music and starts reminding you of how fun your past was; this can happen at anytime of the day. The past whispers via memories, “pssst . . . yesterday was better than today!”

You may be at work, eating lunch or arguing with a coworker when these memories become activated. All of a sudden, you start relating to these memories, making you feel miserable in the present. Your past turns up the music even louder, dancing more vigorously in your mind, “You bet your ass off that your past was better than today!”

This makes you feel more sad and upset. You start becoming pessimistic, believing that your future will suck just as much as your present. You start to daydream, recounting all of the awesome times in your past, while ignoring your present circumstances. You may even start crying, recalling how much you miss your past.

The past is great at coming back from the dead and making you hate the present; sometimes it does it with a malicious intent, while other times it playfully teases you. It depends on how you interpret these memories. If you are optimistic for the future and maintain a positive mindset in the present, memories of your past become pleasant or at least tolerable.

It’s when you’re unhappy with the present that you give your past more power than it deserves. When this happens, your past turns up even more, inviting others over to its condo, “Let’s rock this place until 6 in the morning!” At this point, you are so distraught about your present, while focused on your past, that you may even turn to alcohol or drugs to help numb the pain.

Don’t allow your past to control your present emotions. When memories of your past kick in automatically, maintain a present state of mind that is under your control.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Life Is A Trail Of Memories

Person holding gray photo of three girls near chainlink fence around house

No Tolls On Memory Lane

The beauty of life does not always lie in the present moment. You can find the beauty in a small center within your brain called the hippocampus; the memory bank that holds your accumulated experiences. Life is a trail of memories and its beauty lies within your recollections of the past; there are no tolls on memory lane. Feel free to endlessly navigate.

One of the best ways to relax your mind and alleviate your accumulated daily stress is by putting on a nice tune that takes you mentally back to pleasant times in your past. Engaging with your trail of memories that lie within your mind is quite soothing and can make you feel happy and appreciative of life’s beautiful moments.

With good memories also come bad ones, but you don’t have to dwell on those. As a matter of fact, if your mind hasn’t already repressed them, you can voluntarily suppress them. You can do this by identifying your bad memories and no longer paying attention to them; act as if you have never experienced them in the first place.

The saying “don’t live in the past” is very true, but why not stroll down memory lane from time to time, especially if you’ve had good experiences which you can reminisce on. Memory lane is like a gift that you can endlessly enjoy; unless suffering from a neurological disorder that impacts your retrieval of memories, you can utilize this gift indefinitely.

And what can be even more pleasant is taking a stroll down memory lane with someone who you have experienced good times with in the past. Besides your version of the story, your friend, family member or acquaintance can paint an alternate version from their persecutive; their details can contribute to your memory lane.

So what are you waiting for? It’s easier than E-ZPass to hop onto memory lane. Enjoy it!

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

The Past: Potently Sweet But Aggressively Poisonous

Clear hourglass healing the past besides pink flowers

Nothing Heals The Past Like Time

The past is very special because it’s a recollection of events which you can never get back. The memories are the only way you can relive the past and attempt to feel that bit of pleasure you once felt. The saying “stop living in the past” is true to a certain extent.

If your past is preventing you from enjoying the present, then you must stop living in the past. Most people who live in the past are stuck; they long for whatever it was that once brought them pleasure. They don’t know how to let go, so they continue living like there’s no tomorrow (no pun intended).

But if you are leading a healthy and productive life in the present, living in the past can actually be good for you. It’s healthy to reminisce or to indulge in enjoyable recollections of past events. It helps you become more appreciative of the nice things that life has done for you.

Every person in this world has experienced an unfavorable event in their lifetime. Sometimes the event is so awkward, painful or annoying that you wonder how you will ever get rid of it. It’s called time. Time is the master healer of the past. Time doesn’t erase the past; it just helps human consciousness move beyond it.

Something bad from the past will never be erased from your record. What’s done is done. But one can heal and grow from the adverse experience and that is where time comes in handy. It buffers the experience away like a bad scratch on your new blue Mercedes-AMG GT 4-door Coupe.

So don’t sit around and ruminate about the past if you have gone through a bad experience. You will only cause yourself more stress and increase your chances of developing depression or anxiety. Allow time to do the healing for you by just moving on with your life and letting go of the painful memories.

The past is like a double-edged sword: it can be potently sweet but aggressively poisonous as well.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)