Feeling Lonely Today

Lonely, sad man sitting in front of white projector screen

The Battle Known as Loneliness

Feeling lonely today again

The pain harbors in the center of your chest

The empty corners of your room remain isolated

People come and go

Yet you remain in the same place

Isolated with pain and arrested in shame

Is it your fault you constantly ask yourself

Or is it destiny observing the cards you were dealt with?

Whatever the reason may be

Your loneliness eats you alive

The weekends are worse, the weekdays you manage by

How does one exit this trap called loneliness?

Do you accept like a prisoner and hope for the best?

Counting down the days till you can hold someone abreast

Feeling Lonely Today: Yes, so are The Rest of Us

But do you care if others are lonely?

You’re suffering and that’s all that matters

Sure you care about others

But your problems scream louder

You want to connect but you can’t

The block is real

You try harder and harder

But the block is steel

So you do your best riding the wave

It can hit unexpectedly

You don’t want to crash and burn

That can hit unexpectedly

Some days the waves are calm

Others you’re riding the ocean’s roar

Falling down comes around one too many times

Whoever said loneliness was painless?

The Portion of Pain

Emotional pain is a psychological state of mind

It hits you now

You get better

Then does a complete rewind

Just when you thought you were in the clear

The illness swarms back to steal your steer

Maybe we should embrace the pain

An opportunity to gain

If instead you complain

You persist the pain down a long vein

Learning remains the goal

The agenda to evolve through soul

God guides you if you believe

To the top you can go

And you will achieve

Trust the process

Maintain the faith

God will show you which way

All day.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

COVID Depression

Coronavirus – An Era of Depression

I have talked to so many patients who are sitting at home in a depressed state of mind since the pandemic started. The key word is at “home” because they are functional and not so depressed that they require a hospitalization. These people still experience some of the symptoms that come with depression. Even before the coronavirus, there were many Americans already depressed; now, that number has substantially increased. COVID depression is real and you are not alone.

Some of the symptoms of depression may include a decreased sleep, decreased interest in activities, decreased concentration, etc. Some people also experience a decreased appetite, guilt, loss of energy, slowing of body movements or even suicidal ideations. Many Americans experience at least a few of these symptoms while sitting at home with no agenda. The recurring theme is that they lost their job and are not leaving the house; they lack activities that can keep them preoccupied during the day.

Some people also become very anxious at home and anxiety and depression are often comorbid. They will complain that there’s so much negative news or that people in the neighborhood are not wearing masks. They complain, “people don’t care as if there’s no pandemic going on.” What’s important to understand is that we cannot force others to wear masks, nor should we expect them to. It’s a free world and people have the right to do what they want.

Are you Experiencing COVID Depression?

So why am I pointing out the obvious? Because clearly it’s making you anxious that others aren’t following health officials’ recommendations. But why are you getting hurt in the process? You should not be anxious or depressed because of external factors. You need to learn how to place uncontrollable external factors aside and focus on bettering yourself. Do your due diligence by wearing a mask and washing your hands but don’t expect others to do the same.

It’s not easy being home unemployed due to COVID. Some people work from home but still feel depressed because their previous routine of leaving the house and coming back in the evening has been taken away from them. They are not used to using their home space as a work environment after working away from home for over twenty years. As I have mentioned in many previous articles, depression is like a wave and many times you don’t see it coming; you just have to ride it out without falling down.

This pandemic is a similar wave but much bigger and deadlier. It may be harder to hold on but it’s definitely doable. So don’t allow this wave of depression to knock you off your surfboard. Many people are experiencing the negative emotions that you are; you are never alone in this. So maintain a positive mindset, keep yourself preoccupied during the day by finding work, taking long walks outside, reading, exercising and socializing. Don’t allow anxiety and depression to get to you and certainly don’t allow them to bring you down!

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Feeling Sad and Lonely

Not Running Away From Sadness

Whenever we experience sadness, we tend to bury it rather than allowing it to linger. This is because nobody likes feeling sad and lonely, so it’s easier to just brush it under the carpet and clean it up later. The problem with doing this is that you are not uprooting what is making you feel sad in the first place. Even though sadness is an uncomfortable emotion, you want to fully immerse yourself in it and see what thoughts and feelings arise out of it.

For some, it’s not an easy process because they feel like their ego is jeopardized. They believe that sadness threatens their masculinity. For others on the opposite end of the spectrum, they spend too much time dwelling over their sadness, experiencing it all day and never letting go of it. You don’t want to find yourself at the ends of the spectrum; the happy medium is always best.

Feeling Sad and Lonely – A Journey That Has to Be Felt

This involves experiencing sadness when it kicks in but also knowing when to turn it off when certain circumstances arise. If you’re at work, it’s better to suppress it and revisit it when you get home. But if you’re at home and have nothing important to do, you can try practicing mindfulness while also becoming in touch with your sadness. This will allow you to process the thoughts associated with your sadness and potentially help you recover from it.

It’s always better to process your sadness than leaving it unhinged. There’s always a reason to why you are feeling sad and you need to get to the bottom of it. Don’t be afraid to encounter new thoughts and feelings which are foreign to you; this is the process of growth. And always remember that you are never alone; millions of people all over the world are experiencing sadness with you at this very moment.

What are some things that you are sad about?

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Don’t Shy Away From Your Loneliness

Cornered By Darkness

The feeling of loneliness can easily creep up into your life when you least expect it. One moment you have all your friends surrounding you, a significant other and everything going for you and the next you find yourself in a new chapter called, “WTF! What is happening to my life?” This is how life works; it’s unpredictable and you have to be prepared for all scenarios because if you aren’t, then you will be hit very hard.

Don’t be one of those people who shies away from their loneliness and keeps their feelings buried within themselves. Whenever you allow loneliness to overwhelm you by not sharing your feelings with others, it invites its best friend named depression. When depression and loneliness throw a party in your bedroom, trust me when I say that you’ll be suffering in pain.

Many people are too proud of themselves to ever admit that they are lonely; to do so means that they are weak and that others will look down upon them. This is because their ego is too inflated and this is a big weakness; your ego can lead to your downfall if not kept in check. Think of your ego as a stubborn entity who sometimes likes the freedom that you give it a little too much; whenever you are easygoing on its leash, it can suddenly take over and do what it wants.

Your ego can be so stubborn at times that it can lead you into depression. It’s not like it wants to do you harm but when you don’t control it, you become more susceptible to developing a mental illness. In this case, it’s depression in the context of loneliness. The worst combination to be suffering from is an inflated ego + loneliness + depression; this is a recipe for disaster.

If you are suffering from loneliness then please come out and admit it to the world. You can do so with your friends, family and even on this platform, but whatever you do, do not withhold it from others. Loneliness is a dangerous breeding ground for mental illness and you don’t want to take a chance going down that path; you just don’t know which way mental illness will take you.

You don’t have to be ashamed of your loneliness; most of the world is going through it right now. You’ll feel much better coming out and sharing it with the world. You’ll also come to learn just how many people are actually suffering from loneliness and this will help make you feel better about yourself, knowing that you’re not the only one. It’s not necessarily your fault that loneliness has struck you; it’s called life circumstances. You just have to find a way to recover from it by continuing to move forward in a positive state of mind.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

What Sucks About Being Single (Even When You’re Cool With It)  — Thought Catalog

The thing that sucks the most about being single is the societal belief that you’re better off in a relationship. That you must be miserable if you’re alone. That you could not possibly be happy unless you’re in a committed relationship that is headed somewhere serious. Even when you’re cool with your single status, it’s…

What Sucks About Being Single (Even When You’re Cool With It)  — Thought Catalog

Feeling Lonely On Friday Night

Lonely Feeling At Home

One of the worst feelings to experience is coming home from work on a Friday evening to an empty apartment. After working hard the entire week, the last feeling that you want to experience is loneliness. But loneliness is very common; more common than you would think. But some of you are not buying it, thinking something along the lines of, “I don’t care how other people are feeling, I’m the one who is suffering. For all I know, other people may be doing fun things, while I’m home alone!”

This is a common mental battle which we all experience: believing that others must be living their lives while we’re at home suffering by ourselves. This is a misconception that you must remove from your mind today! Never assume that others are having fun or are happy; this will only make your situation worse.

So many people are in the exact position that you are in. They wish that they would have a group of consistent friends or a significant other who they can happily spend time with on the weekends. But unfortunately, this is not always the case. Life takes you through many different cycles.

These cycles can change at any minute: one day you are in college with your closest frat bros; the next day, you’re 30 years of age and single at home on a Friday night. It’s just the way the world works. But sitting and moping around won’t change your circumstances.

What will change your circumstances is a positive mindset, a strong belief in change and actions! Without a positive mindset and strong beliefs, it becomes very difficult to see any meaningful changes in your life. But positivity and beliefs aren’t enough; you need to implement your beliefs and turn them into actions.

Actions are probably the hardest to apply because it involves changing your habits and ways. And the older that you get, the more difficult it becomes to implement new actions. When you’re young, you have more curiosity, energy and drive to have fun, meet new people and go out to new places.

But that doesn’t mean that you can’t still do all those things when you are older; it just requires a bigger effort. If you are feeling lonely on a Friday night, then remind yourself that you are not alone! We are all in this together. Learn to put aside the negative chatter in your mind and enjoy your company. This phase shall one day pass too!

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

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