Don’t Even Think Twice About Porn

Man's fingers in a sliced red fruit

Porn: A Lusty Haven Designed For Destruction

Porn feeds on the weakness of human beings. What is brilliant about it is that it utilizes weak human beings to capitalize on others’ weaknesses. While it’s not right to judge others and call them weak, their actions is all we have to go by; unless you know them on a personal level.

Porn is nothing but a pleasure haven designed for the destruction of the soul via physical means. By filming consensual adults having sex and performing other lusty behaviors, the human mind becomes extremely entertained. What is even more terrible about it is that it has the power to attract people who are married.

About 50% of American men would rather watch porn than to sleep with their wives. What separates the two is that a pornographic girl can do whatever you desire; there’s a video for that too! But a wife cannot fulfill her husband’s every fantasy; sexual acts come with different personalities.

Porn also makes people view their spouses differently; they no longer are as sexually attracted to them, because they cannot obtain that same level of pleasure which porn provides them with. It has a lot to do with dopamine released by the Nucleus Accumbens, or the reward center of the human brain.

Porn hijacks the reward center and promotes the release of high quantities of dopamine. When a man sleeps with his wife the following day, way less dopamine is released; unless his wife is banging that is (no pun intended)! And so that explains the deteriorating marriages due to porn.

By hijacking the brain, crumbling relationships and increasing the desire for more, porn puts the user in a vulnerable position for spiritual destruction. Imagine a person sitting at his laptop masturbating, while his face is slowly turning demonic; figuratively speaking, his values, morals and principles are slowly dissipating.

Don’t do porn. You’re much better than it.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Glued To Our Cell Phones

People holding their cell phones while sitting in public outdoors

Technological Addiction

The idea of going one day without your cell phone is unimaginable by today’s standards and expectations. You’d probably have your family members and significant other entertaining the thought of filling out a missing persons report. Cell phones are probably the most addicting technological piece of hardware known to modern mankind.

The fact that smartphones can basically do everything from GPS to tracking your heart rate, keeps people from putting them down for even one hour of their day. But it’s not so much the features that keep people glued; the idea of instant contact via texts, calls, emails and social media is driving this madness!

People love to socialize, and what better way than on-demand access at their fingertips? This form of connection via FaceTime, iMessage and social media is almost replacing in-person meetups; why leave your home when you can communicate from your couch? Don’t get me wrong, people still meet up all the time.

But we’re not as motivated to meet up because of the on-demand access; especially when it comes to dating. Why get dressed to go out when cold and rainy, when you can just use Tinder or Bumble to match with someone and hope to get a chat fired up? Our phones are literally learning how to control us with every yearly upgrade.

Have you ever tried disconnecting yourself from your cell phone for at least one day? Try and see if you can put your cell phone away for one entire Saturday! You will see how difficult it is, because your mind has become trained to continuously use apps and to anticipate people contacting you.

Even if we want to put our phones down, it becomes very hard to do so because our minds have become addicted to it. However, we don’t consider it an addiction unless someone goes overboard with it, as per societal standards. But aren’t we all overusing our phones on a daily basis?

So what is the solution? The expectation that you’ll use your phone for less than 10 minutes per day is out of the question; achieving that is unrealistic, unless if you are a monk! But you can decrease your usage and the way you view your cell phone by literally not caring so much about it.

Stop viewing your cell phone as this be-all-end-all technological prize. Appreciate what it can do for you, but learn to replace cell phone time with meditation, praying, in-person communication, reading and even thinking! Do we even think anymore? That’s an entire separate subject to be considered.

Just remember that you are greater than your cell phone; don’t allow it to take a hold of you.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

The Passion To Exercise

Silhouette of three women running on concrete road outdoors under blue sky

Only You Can Motivate Yourself

Let’s face it . . . we all wish to some extent to be more disciplined in our workout routines. Maintaining consistency from week to week is a difficult task for many people, especially for those who are not involved in sports or lead busy careers in totally different industries. But regardless of where we stand, we can always find some time to hit the gym or the jogging trails.

Part of the reason that many people do not maintain a consistent exercise routine has to do with motivation. Motivation or the general desire or willingness to exercise has to come from you! Motivation is difficult to maintain because exercising is not an easy task; for many people, it does not come naturally.

Some hope that by paying a personal trainer to motivate them once or twice a week, they will suddenly see a significant difference; don’t bet on it. Either one of two things will happen:

  • You’ll enjoy it for a while but give up later by canceling your trainer
  • You’ll keep paying your trainer but not see any significant results

Your trainer cannot improve your physique if you’re not motivated in the first place! Anyone can go ahead and sign up with a trainer, but not everyone can give 110% during their workouts. Your personal trainer is most likely not going to yell at you because you’re slacking; the guy or gal wants to keep you happy and not scare you off!

Without motivation, it’s likely that you’ll stop seeing your trainer in the near future. And when that’s done, you’ll most likely stop exercising altogether. Motivation is the root of all good things that have the potential to come into your life. It cannot be given to you; you have to create it within yourself.

On the other hand, there are many people who casually exercise while maintaining a decent level of motivation. These are not the people who are jacked like Arnold Schwarzenegger or fit like Cristiano Ronaldo. They are the people who are fit enough to look good and feel great!

And that can be you! You see, motivation can be built upon with the maintenance of a consistent exercise routine. That’s because the more results that you observe in the mirror, the more motivation that you’ll continue to receive; hard work rewards you with happiness and motivation!

Are you DSM Fit?

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Searching For Meaning

Funny man in suit using magnifying glass to enlarge his blue sunglasses and nose

Feeling Lost In Life

Being consistently patient is a difficult task for many people, because we often seek immediate results and new opportunities for fun and adventures times. Whenever you find yourself leading a repetitive life, you scratch your head even harder, hoping to find more meaning in life.

You may find yourself searching for meaning by meditating, consuming psychedelic drugs such as DMT, psilocybin or LSD, attending church or performing intensive internet searches; some people even join cults. There is nothing wrong with searching for meaning, but you should do it in a natural manner.

By natural, this means that you should not be forcing yourself to search for meaning. Whenever you are forcing yourself, it’s usually out of boredom, non-satisfaction with life or feeling empty inside. These scenarios do not usually lead to new meanings; you often end up back at square one.

Naturally searching for meaning is when you are leading a productive and satisfactory life: you are enjoying your job; are happy with yourself; have friends to socialize with; are close to your family, etc. When you find yourself searching for more meaning during these times, you will often find it naturally without actually looking for it.

This occurs because you are not actually directing your attention to finding new meaning; you are too busy enjoying your life. As with many things in life, we often receive a new opportunity or meet a new person when we least expect it. If you learn to accept this fact, it will become much easier for you to discover new meaningful ideas, without experiencing a frustrating and disappointing journey.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Feeling Sad During The Holidays

Portrait of sad man's face in the dark during the holidays

No Pleasure During The Holidays

Sadness is not at the level of depression, but can still be painful enough to cause you to feel no pleasure, especially during the holidays. If one is depressed, they’ll usually have their appetite, sleep, concentration, energy level, movements and thoughts affected; many can no longer attend work.

But if someone is sad, they feel unhappy, lousy and do not find much pleasure in the activities which they once enjoyed. Many people feel sad during the holidays for various reasons:

  • They have no family to be around with
  • They have no friends to be around with
  • They are lonely and not surrounded by good company
  • They are battling an injury that is providing them with great physical pain
  • They are sad about other events in their lives
  • They are experiencing Seasonal Affective Disorder or Major Depressive Disorder

. . . and so on. There is no one universal reason for feeling sad during the holidays, and there is no psychiatric diagnosis that combines sadness with the holidays. But sadness during the holidays does not necessarily mean that it’s a coincidence. The holidays are meant to be a time when close ones gather together to laugh and have fun!

Someone may know in advance that they will be spending the holidays by themselves, causing them to feel sad from ahead of time. When the holidays do arrive, they find themselves deprived of their spirit and joy; it’s as if they have turned into a living mummy. Their self-esteem goes out the window, and any motivation to derive some pleasure from the current situation is killed on the spot.

If you are experiencing sadness during the holidays, know that you are not alone! There are many people in your shoes experiencing the same feelings. Do not start to entertain suicidal thoughts due to the belief that you are a “loser” and by yourself; do not give depression power.

Even those who are around a boat of friends and family members may feel sad. A lot of times, sadness has nothing to do with who you are around with. Why do we hear stories of wealthy people and celebrities dying from drug overdoses? They had everything at their fingertips.

When feeling sad, find a way to become comfortable with your own presence; especially if no one is available for you to talk to! When you learn how to become comfortable with just “you,” things will start to feel better. And you can always contact The DSM Ready Community for love and support!

Happy holidays!

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Being A Superficial Person

Superficial and elegant woman dressed in fancy clothes staring at building outdoors

Attracted To Materialism

The proverb, “one should not judge a book by its cover” is very true when it comes to analyzing others’ behaviors, expressions and thought processes. There are many superficial people who enjoy materialism but have a heart of gold! On the other hand, there are many superficial people who couldn’t care less about others’ thoughts and feelings.

Society has trained us to be quick to jump to a judgment or stereotype based on how someone dresses, speaks, behaves or carries themself. This is because all of the characters who we can think of are represented fairly accurately in Hollywood films and music videos.

By observing these characters on television or in lyrics, we are being trained to judge others; it has almost become an automatic process. So when we see “superficial” people behaving like Kim Kardashian or the Jersey Shore crew, we are quick to jump to a conclusion: “superficial.”

But this approach to viewing people is wrong and only contributes to the divide which our world is experiencing. Just because someone appears superficial on the surface, does not mean that they are not caring and loving individuals on the inside. Who are you to judge a person who you do not even know?

In the bible it says, “You hypocrite! First, remove the beam out of your own eye, and then you can see clearly to remove the speck out of your brother’s eye.” We are so quick to jump to conclusions about others’ behaviors, that we forget to look at ourselves first and fix what we do wrong.

There is nothing wrong with someone who is attracted to materialism, as long as they are not allowing that attraction to influence their inner being in a negative way. It is actually worse for us to sit around and point our fingers at a superficial person, than it is for the person to be superficial in the first place.

At least that person is being themself by admitting to their superficiality. But what are we, by judging other human beings’ ways of living? It doesn’t make us any better! Rather than spending so much energy judging others, we need to come together and learn from each other, superficial or not.

The DSM Ready Movement is about the integration of all people with a good heart and solid intentions.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Thanksgiving Should Be Every Day

Group of young people hugging each other

Happy Thanksgiving

It’s very lovely that people gather once a year to offer their expressions of gratitude towards their family, friends, coworkers and God. This brings upon us unification, love, happiness and a feeling of warmth, which can effectively heal a mental illness and its associated emotions. But what would be nicer to observe from now on, is the celebration of Thanksgiving on a daily basis!

Unfortunately, many people put on a mask during the holidays in order to fit in with the rest of society celebrating times of unity. These masks are not hard to detect; pay attention to their body language and choice of words before the holidays, during and after. You will notice many inconsistencies, easily giving away their public facade.

People put on masks during the holidays because they are dealing with internal pain and insecurities, which they have not learned how to overcome. By not overcoming their internal problems, the holidays actually make them feel worse. How would you feel if you were put in a position to smile and chit-chat with folks who you see twice a year, while you are feeling depressed inside?

So the solution is to increase the frequency of Thanksgiving; not twice a year or every month, but every single day of the year! Every day should be an opportunity for us to learn more about each other and how we can be more involved in each other’s lives. Every day we need to become more passionate in our interactions with others.

It’s easier said than done, but definitely applicable on a large scale if many people around the world start applying this way of living! With every person who you pass this message to, someone new around the world can be touched and moved by it. What is missing from our world today, is genuine unity among the masses.

We are more divided than ever and no particular person or group is to blame. The reality is that our human nature has not evolved much beyond selfishness. And in order to alter our human nature, it starts with as many people around the world applying the notion of Thanksgiving being every day.

It’s possible to change our course of reality, but it cannot be done with 10, 100 or 10,000 people here and there. This calls for a worldwide implementation of acceptance and unity on a grand scale; a platform based on unconditional love extending to all parts of the world; a new modern-day hippie movement!

And together we can!

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Questioning Your Sexuality

Multicolored striped painted homosexual surface

When Your Mind Plays Tricks On You

Most people who are homosexual state that they knew from a young age of their sexual preference; a young age meaning childhood or early adolescence. Some people also claim that their failed heterosexual relationships, have caused them to identify more strongly with the same sex. Whatever the reason, many people can attest to the fact that at some point in their lives, they have questioned their sexual orientation.

Questioning your sexuality can happen for many reasons. One reason is simple curiosity: “how would it feel to experience a sexual encounter with the same sex?” There are many people who end up experiencing a homosexual experience, even though they don’t identify as homosexuals.

This can occur in people who are hyper-sexual to begin with. It may be sparked by a bad heterosexual experience, a lack of a recent heterosexual experience or simple curiosity for the same sex. These people don’t usually turn to homosexuality from there on; it’s called sexual experimentation.

Then there are people who have had too many negative sexual encounters with people of the opposite sex; this can occur with women and men. Out of frustration and desperation, they turn to the same sex as a source of potential comfort and emotional healing. If it turns out to be a positive experience, some of them remain homosexual or begin to identify as bisexual.

There are also people who had or currently suffer from OCD and experience a train of persistent homosexual thoughts. These people are not homosexual, but their illness keeps repeating the same thoughts over and over, making them question their sexual orientation. The solution is to just allow the thoughts to be, knowing within that they are heterosexuals.

As you can see, sexual orientation is influenced by the environment and mental illness. While genetics may be at play, it is not fully known whether homosexuals have inherited genes or not. What is for sure from many people who are homosexual, is that they had these feelings towards the same sex from a young age.

At the end of the day, just be yourself.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Working During Thanksgiving

Brunette woman working on her MacBook Pro during Thanksgiving week

Staying Positive During The Holidays

Some of us have to work during Thanksgiving week and on Thanksgiving day. Remaining positive during this week may prove to be a challenge for some, as many people have taken this week off to be with their families and friends. But even if you are by yourself and working, remind yourself that there is nothing wrong with going to work and doing your job!

The important thing is to find meaning in what you do. When you do this, the idea of working during a holiday week becomes less painful and distracting; you end up putting yourself in a good state of mind. You see, holidays are outside factors which influence you within. But if you can learn how to influence yourself, then outside factors become less impactful.

You can also remind yourself that you are not the only one working during this week. Millions of people around the world and in the United States are working during this week; you are not unique in this regard! Continue to go to work and do your best! Find satisfaction in what you do and aim to continuously improve yourself and your circumstances.

The last thing that you want to do is to go to work miserable this week, thinking that everyone else has taken off. This is a pessimistic and self-destructive mentality. You are allowing your mind to play tricks on you, because you very well know that many people continue to work during the holidays.

If you are working on Thanksgiving, let The DSM Ready community know! We are here to help each other out whenever we are feeling sad, stressed or anxious about certain situations in our lives!

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Afraid Of Losing

Statute of disappointed man hugging his knees

Not Living Up To Your Expectations

There is a lot of pressure to succeed in this day and age. Just open up your MacBook and search among the many successful Twitter or Instagram pages, or a banging Youtube Vlog depicting beautiful sceneries from around the world. You then shut your MacBook off in anger, taking a look in the mirror and wondering to yourself, “what the hell am I doing?”

Sometimes our expectations are little too high and we become too hard on ourselves. There is nothing wrong with having dreams, but if these dreams are making you work in counterproductive ways, then you are doing yourself more of a disservice. It’s not always about how hard you work, but how efficient and smart you also are!

Sometimes you just need to take a step back and reanalyze your expectations. There is nothing wrong if you have to cut back on some or tweak them in order to make them more realistic. This is part of the process of being smart! When you repeat the same mistakes or strategies over and over and don’t see new results, then you are beating yourself into a dead end.

Then there are the people who are afraid to lose because the pressure is just too great; it builds up in them like a steaming pot on top of an oven. Rather than finding ways to redirect their pressure onto other activities, such as exercising, they freeze and allow it to continuously build up until they give up!

When you are feeling too much pressure from your expectations, you need to remind yourself that pressure is what keeps you going. But too much pressure can be counterproductive and even scare you away from your goals! So you find a way to feel less pressure, either by reminding yourself that everyone experiences it, or by tweaking your expectations.

But you cannot be afraid to lose! Once you allow fear to marinate in the back of your mind, then you will start to slowly crumble; your dreams and goals will fade farther away from your reach. Sometimes it’s better to not think so much about the process; just do what you have to do to achieve your goals!

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)