Backstabbers Never Rest

Angry blonde woman walking away from backstabbing-man in park

Some Friends Can’t Be Trusted

There are many people who will come across your way and get you excited as a potential new friend. You may even have a lot in common with them, thinking that you’ve just made yourself a “keeper of a friend.” You guys may laugh a lot, share a similar sense of humor and even get lunches together. But you can really tell who your real friends are when they start to act differently at times and refuse to help you out when you ask them to. Backstabbers never rest.

So why do they do this if you have so much in common with them? It’s because you’re not really in their heart. They may like you and enjoy spending time with you, but when he turns left and you turn right, you become “out of sight, out of mind” for him. At first, you won’t be able to tell right away because you’ll be blinded by the illusion of being decent friends.

But this illusion will slowly break down when you ask them not once but at least twice to help you out with something. And I’m not talking about something small and insignificant. We’re talking about asking for help in a situation that would make your life easier and even offering to help them back in the future.

But it doesn’t matter because they can’t find it within their heart to help you. It’s not necessarily that they don’t want to help you, but they put their selfish interests before yours, something that an apparent decent friend should not do. Good friends learn to sacrifice their self-interests from time to time to come through for their boys!

Many of these types of friends can be classified as backstabbers; when you turn your back, they silently attack. But they don’t necessarily attack by putting you down in front of others or doing you harm without your noticing. They attack by throwing you under the bus in a certain situation in which you didn’t deserve to be in, in the first place.

You then confront them hoping that they’ll recognize their mistakes and change for the better, but keep dreaming folks! No change ever happens. So the veil has been removed and you now see their true character; it doesn’t really shine as brightly as you once thought. And guess what happens at this point in time? Your unconscious mind has recorded everything that has just happened and will start influencing your perception of them.

You will now start to view them in the light that they deserve to be viewed and that light is no where near your standards anymore. If you have eyes, then open them and start using them! These types of people surround us every day and we don’t deserve to give them our genuine kindness and love. However, we must still remain kind and loving human beings at all times, but while keeping in mind who our real friends truly are.

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Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Integrity Comes Before Self-Interests

Young black man shaking hands with brown man across wooden table

Doing What’s Right Even If It Means Feeling A Little Pain

The easy way out in life does not deliver you respect from others; it shouldn’t even deliver respect from your own self. People choose the easy way out all the time out of fear and insecurity; they know deep inside that they are succumbing to anxiety. But you have to learn how to control your anxiety; if you don’t, then it tends to become pathological. Remember that integrity comes before self-interests.

Integrity is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. Someone who has integrity does what is right in a certain situation, even if it means exposing themselves to a little pain. The more integrity that you display, the better you will feel about yourself and the more respect that you will earn from others.

Don’t expect respect when your integrity flops at random times. It means that you cannot be trusted and when you cannot be trusted, certain doors will close for you in life. Sometimes the best things in life are saved for those with the most integrity because actions always speak louder than words.

Would you not be willing to help someone out more who displays consistent integrity? Someone’s integrity gives you confidence that they can be trusted and can be there for you when they’re counted on. Unfortunately, many people are afraid of negative outcomes and so they sacrifice their integrity so that they can feel comfortable.

You have to understand that comfort has to be sacrificed at times in order to do what is right. Everyone wants to be comfortable; it’s part of human nature. But not everyone wants to do the right thing. The more that you practice doing what is right, the easier it will become and people will take notice! And when people take notice, they spread the word to others about how impressive your record of integrity has been.

You just never know what important person may hear about you and give you a call one day asking, “Are you interested in this offer?” And your life may change right there and then.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Redesigning Ourselves

Grayscale photography of black man standing in front of cross smiling

Praying For Each Other

Everyday selfishness is what prevents humanity from coming together to defeat the evilness that rules this world. Human nature, by design, is filled with selfishness but this does not mean that we cannot redesign ourselves. But the problem is that many do not know how to do this . . . many have not yet found it within their hearts the will to redesign themselves.

People wrongfully believe that redesigning themselves comes from within. It does to a certain extent but the percentage is small compared to asking God for help and guidance. That’s because when you attempt to redesign yourself without God’s help, you rely on the power found within you, and that power is humanly-derived; it can only take you so far.

That’s why you need God’s power to more effectively redesign yourself, and that can only be achieved by accepting and loving God in your mind and heart. Don’t bother if you’re going to be superficial about it; God knows you better than you know yourself. You must put God before your parents, siblings and significant other . . . you must put God before any human.

If you disagree with this, then you are disagreeing with the idea of putting your maker or creator before other humans. If it were not for God, you would have never had life and the chance to meet these humans who you call your “family.” God has blessed you with life, so if you want to redesign it, you must go back and reconnect with the source!

Fancy rituals, prayers in public, avoidance of certain foods, animal sacrifices . . . this is not what God is looking for; He does not want religious nuts but spiritual fruits! What God wants is a pure loving heart that is selfless and prays for others to improve as well. In praying for each other, you are not only redesigning yourself but are contributing to the improvement of others’ lives.

This is how humanity will improve and this is how we will better tackle mental illness, substance abuse, hatred, division and worldly pandemics.

This is how we will come together and love each other just the way that God envisions it for us.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

28 Coronavirus Pickup Lines You Can Use On Tinder — Thought Catalog

Coronavirus is taking over the world but people are still on dating apps. If we’re all this thing together, it means we can keep talking and bringing joy to others as we self-quarantine. Please use these pickup lines to wow the woman or man of your choosing and continue to have a whirlwind pen pal…

28 Coronavirus Pickup Lines You Can Use On Tinder — Thought Catalog

People Love To Put Us Down

Man about to kick woman standing on cliff near ocean

Don’t Be Like Others

Sometimes it feels like there’s no one who you can trust. Even the nicest people can suddenly turn their backs on you and act completely different at unexpected times. It hurts to experience this because you devote energy and kindness, only to be presented with unexpected rudeness and nastiness. The truth is that people love to put us down and we here at The DSM Ready Community cannot allow people to affect our mental health in negative ways.

The most important thing is to not react to others’ rudeness, especially if you have to work with them or associate with them on a consistent basis; in other words, don’t be like others. Even though it hurts to experience rudeness, you want to continue to maintain your composure and demonstrate kindness, professionalism and positivity.

For many people, doing this may prove to be a difficult task because our instinct is to revolt and respond with anger and rudeness. But our instinct is not always right; that’s why society “progresses” and “evolves.” Our instinct is based on genetic traits passed down from previous generations.

But if previous generations held genes responsible for increasing your chances of developing alcoholism, would you continue to stick with your instinct to drink? Sometimes we have to correct our instincts; doing so will improve our lives and the lives of our offspring. So never respond with rudeness when someone stabs you in the back.

This goes back to the bible where it teaches us to kiss and love our enemies. When we do this, we strive to remain calm and good people and demonstrate love in the process. This is the only way that people will learn to improve their behavior. When they see us not react to their rudeness, they will burn inside, wondering why their attacks do not influence us.

We have a role here at The DSM Ready Community: to unite and act as role models for society by demonstrating kindness, purity, love and the acceptance of mental health issues. Through our words and actions we will be able to change the world for the better.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Women Keep Us Going

Young blonde woman sitting on cliff watching body of water and trees

International Women’s Day

If it weren’t for women, men would be running around like headless chickens with no direction in mind. Women are much more nurturing than men, are smarter in different ways and frankly, much more beautiful. In other words, women keep us going. International women’s day is a time to recognize women’s rights and raise awareness for anti-sexism and anti-discrimination.

Women have just as much knowledge, determination and stamina as men do when it comes to the workforce. Gender should no longer matter in regards to salary. If a woman holds the same position as a man, then both should make similar amounts. A man should not be making 30 grand more per year just because of his gender. Gender inequality should no longer be taking place.

Women also view the world differently than men. Because of less testosterone, women tend to be less violent and more nurturing. Maybe it’s time for a female president? It’s time that women hold higher positions in the government and in the workforce in general. The world deserves less aggressiveness and more nurture.

Women deserve ongoing support for domestic violence and sexual assaults that they encounter throughout their lives. Keep in mind that there are a batch of men with antisocial personality disorder or psychosis who adopt the sexual predator role, but that not all men should be thrown in the same category. Women should no longer be exposed to violence and sexual assaults in this day and age.

Asides from the fact that women should have equal rights with men, international women’s day is a time to respect women overall. They are beautiful creatures with awesome personalities who are funny, caring, loving and fun to be around with. If there were no women in this world, man’s downfall would be just around the corner.

Women are great! It’s time to continue respecting them.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Condescending People Running Around

Silhouette of woman doing heart sign during sunset in front of body of water

Tormented On The Inside, Superficially Happy On The Out

There’s just too many of them; you will never escape them. They roam this world proudly sticking their chins up and chests out; their arrogance is wisely disguised. They know how to conceal their true emotions, but it sneaks down their face and trumpets out their mouths in well-disguised ways. Condescending people are running around and we can’t stop them.

Nor should we want to stop them. What do we stand to gain by calling them out on their snobbish behavior? Would it make us feel any better? It’s not like their behavior would change; if anything, they would look more down upon us than originally intended. The solution is never to counterstrike with the same shots that they use against you.

Keep in mind that condescending people are tormented on the inside, whether on an unconscious or conscious level. How so? Anyone that thinks that they are better than you does not have peace in their heart. For instance, Jesus was born as the Son of God during his time on Earth. Did he walk around putting people down despite holding the ultimate glory? He did not because he had peace in his heart.

Condescending people do not have peace in their hearts; otherwise, they wouldn’t be snobbish in the first place. Someone who has peace in their heart can be the richest person in the world, yet still act humble, nice and enjoy laughs with the masses. Once you understand this concept, then the solution to dealing with condescending people will make sense to you.

What is the solution? Treat them nicely as if you are not affected by their behavior. Even if you feel pain on the inside, continue to treat them nicely. When you do this, this causes them to burn with fury on the inside, in addition to their superficial happiness portrayed on the out. You don’t fight fire with fire; you utilize water at all costs.

You are the water and they are the fire. Who always wins in the end despite a vicious battle from time to time?

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

So Good They Can’t Ignore You

Blonde woman feeling ignored while sitting next to trees with head down

The Last Thing You Did Was Ignore Them

Whether it’s a patient, family member or friend, you never want to get into the habit of ignoring anyone. There will be many people in life who you will be tempted to ignore because of their character flaws. But we all have character flaws; do we expect others to ignore us? So good they can’t ignore you is not a universal situation, nor should we expect it to be.

Not many people have the charisma, wit, humor and good looks that you may have. People may not ignore you, but they very well may be ignoring others. When someone is ignored, guess how it makes them feel? Beneath you, not good enough, “something wrong with me,” pathetic and maybe . . . “not worthy of living.

When you’re ignoring someone, you’re playing with their self-esteem. You don’t know how they’re already feeling inside; they may be in the midst of depression and you’re ignoring them may be the tipping point into committing suicide. It’s not that you’d be held responsible if they did commit suicide, but how would you feel if you learned that someone who you ignored yesterday, is now gone today?

Sometimes death occurs very unexpectedly, similar to the death of Kobe Bryant. Sometimes, the last thing you did was ignore a person, thinking to yourself, “I’ll just see them next time. I don’t have time right now,” only to find out that the person passed away from a medical complication.

Guess how that will make you feel? Oftentimes, it makes you feel bad that you didn’t get a chance to talk to them one last time. Your mind starts replaying the memory of your last encounter, emphasizing how you quickly brushed passed them, ignoring what they were trying to tell you.

Life should never be taken for granted; not even interactions with people who we don’t particularly like. Every person deserves their own platform to speak their mind. We don’t have to agree with them, but the least that we can do is allow them to speak and share their feelings and thoughts.

So good they can’t ignore you? It doesn’t apply to everyone.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)

Don’t Settle For An Unbalanced, Unreliable, Untrustworthy Relationship  — Thought Catalog

Don’t settle for an unbalanced relationship where you’re always doing the bulk of the work. Where you’re running around, trying to get chores done and plan dates and come up with conversation topics. Where you’re in charge of every single aspect that makes the relationship run smoothly. Where you’re loaded down with stress. You need…

Don’t Settle For An Unbalanced, Unreliable, Untrustworthy Relationship  — Thought Catalog

Moving On From Lovestruck

Two people in love on beach during sunset

Love Island

We’ve all experienced situations when we meet someone who we really like, only to have it end sooner than we desired or expected. Experiencing lovestruck can happen at any age; you never know when a certain person will push your buttons and unexpectedly activate you. But when certain buttons are pushed, they can provide you with one of the best feelings in the world; however, moving on from lovestruck is important for your mental health.

The worst days are the immediate ones right after the person who you really liked is no longer in your life. The thought of being alone once again quickly touches down in the center of your mind, eliciting a punching bag of emotions, including tears. The connection you had formed with the other person on love island is no longer at play.

But you cannot continue living on love island if the other person is now gone; it’s not mentally healthy. You have to be thankful that God placed that person in your life for whatever amount of time, and happily move on. It’s tough at first because you dearly miss them, but you have to treat yourself with respect, and suffering from lovestruck is not fair to yourself.

The way that you move on from lovestruck is to remain optimistic that you will meet a new person in the future. You don’t have to forget about the previous person. As a matter of fact, cherish the memories that the two of you built together, but don’t dwell on them all day, every day. Be thankful that you met them and grateful for the experience, but move on into the future.

Love is probably one of the most powerful emotions known to man, especially when you share it with someone who you easily click with, and develop a natural connection from the moment that you lay eyes on each other. But love works in unpredictable ways; as quickly as it comes into your life, just as quickly that it can vanish from it.

But don’t be sad! The most important thing is that you are happy that you had another taste of love island. But you cannot always live on love island forever. Sometimes you have to get back on your boat and return to sailing the deep blue sea.

Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)