Why Do I Hate Being Alone?
Many people struggle being by themselves; they want companionship to fill up as much of their free time as possible. Being alone has almost become an inherent fear; like a specific phobia. But why do why hate being alone and why do we sometimes become mean with ourselves?
Social media has a lot to do with it. When we observe friends or acquaintances having a good time, we naturally want to join them; being alone becomes almost sickening. Social media trains us to want to spend time with others. But the problem is that we lose interest in spending time with ourselves.
It has become so bad that we prefer superficial relationships rather than spending time alone. We crave attention from others like an addict who craves getting high. And when we do not get our fix, in this case spending time with others, we start to hate ourselves and experience self-negativity.
The problem has become that we no longer know how to find pleasure in solitude. Rather than appreciating the fact that it was our “self” who was there for us on all those lonely nights, we start to turn against ourselves. We start to experience negative thoughts such as, “there must be something wrong with me”, “I’m a loser, only losers spend time by themselves”, “I suck at life, I’m clearly doing something wrong.”
All this negative self-chatter only makes us more miserable and attracts more negativity into our lives. Rather than searching for companionship, we need to embrace our presence and enjoy solitude. The key to attracting positive people into our lives is becoming positive with ourselves on a consistent basis.
So stop putting yourself down and start enjoying your presence. Don’t worry about always spending time with others. It’s better to find quality people to spend time with, even if that means hanging out less frequently. In the meantime, focus on improving yourself and enjoying your own company!
Are you Ready? (This is Defeating Stigma Mindfully)